Friday, 11 May 2012

| FanFic - Tearing Ourselves Apart | Parts 16 - 29

Banner by 18shabbo

Part 16 

Khushi woke up dreading what she would see, crying and almost still screaming - No! But what she saw slowed her heart rate down and then sent it racing again. She was clinging on to Arnav, with her head buried in his neck as he lightly snored against her, hugging her around her back and waist. She could hear a burnt out fire crackling lightly behind her. The sky outside was a light gray, having just passed dawn with the snow bringing out more light than there was.

She could smell his aftershave just under his chin where she rested, his pulse warming against her skin. He was alive, he had a pulse. She stayed ever so quiet and listened to him breathing, the sound that had almost deafened her a few seconds ago, a sound which she never wanted to stop. It brought all the images of her dream flashing back through her mind.

She held on to his shirt tighter as she reached up with one hand and wrapped it around his neck, pulling him into a slight hug as the tears from her eyes fell against his neck. Feeling him next to her, alive and safe, was one of the best feelings in the world. She never wanted it to go away.

"You're here" she whispered. She thought she had lost him forever. It was just a silly dream ,she reminded herself. Just a silly dream.

The feel of her lips on his neck jolted him awake from his sleep and he instinctively tightened his grip around her, stopping when he realised that her face was buried in his neck and she was shaking.

The sound of his voice only made her hold on tighter, and he let her lie in his arms, crying gently.

After a while she started to sniffle "Sorry" she sat up slightly, using her fingers to wipe away the wetness from his neck, he closed his eyes at her touch only to raise his arm a few seconds later and place his hand on hers, stopping her "It's okay"he said, thinking she was crying after what had happened last night.

"It's not your fault" he paused, looking down as he continued "I should have been more careful."

Khushi was sitting in his lap, confused at what he was saying "That you didn't get out of the way?" she said, tears in her eyes again as she thought of his blood soaked shirt.

"That I didn't watch out for you"

"But it didn't hit me" she whispered "It hit you, right in the heart" raising her hand and placing it over his chest, calming down when she felt it beating, it was like she constantly needed reassurance.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, concerned that the cold might have messed with her head. Feeling her forehead he asked whether she had a cold.

Khushi suddenly realised that she was sitting in his lap as he felt her forehead to check her temperature. She jumped out of her seat and stumbled, correcting herself awkwardly.

Sunday, 8 April 2012

One Shot - I Will Wait For You (Part 3 Up!)

So I thought of writing a story like this a while ago and never got round to it, so even though I have lost most of my inspiration, I thought I owed it to myself and you guys to at least attempt to write it down.
It might  have 2-3 parts, depending on whether you guys want more? Please leave comments and likes and lots of feedback to let me know what you think, it would really mean a lot.

To anyone who would like notifications when I update, please just email me at with the email address you would like updates emailed to, to join my update list as I only email update people! 

OS : I Will Wait For You

 Song to listen to as you read, it really sets the stage right :)

Arnav watched as countless drops of rain pounded against the ground. He sat on the floor in his room, leaning against the recliner for fear of not being able to support himself. The sky outside the glass panels darkened as the sun fell below it, with its lightness out of reach. How appropriate.

The sun found itself replaced by the slim moon, just a new crescent, peaking through the grey clouds that poured down on the land below it. It was cold, almost howling at the dark night sky sending out fractured moonlight. Broken and hurt. How appropriate.

He tore his eyes away from the window, bringing them down to his hands, marked by dried blood. Her blood, he thought. It was his last thought before he switched his mind off, replacing it by numbness. Nothing more, and nothing less. He tried to forget. He had sat there trying to forget how wrong he had been, how much he had hurt her, how much he needed to make it all right, but he found he couldn’t bear it anymore. Anything other than numbness brought the thought of it all rushing back.

Wednesday, 4 April 2012

IPKKND and it's lost charm !

Hello lovely blog friends !
I don't think many of you have noticed, or care that much to be honest that I have been missing for a while, but I thought I owed you all an explanation nonetheless. Thank you so much for bearing with me through my awfully slow updates, but I wanted to let you know why!
I hope you will give the video a watch and let me know what you think about the show too, or whether I am the only one that has slowly watched IPKKND's charm willow away with the wind :)
Whatever the case being, I haven't given up hope, and shall not do so any time soon so :)

Vlog Index 
Video 1 (Hayley being silly and IPKKND talks)
Video 2                              (My week with IPKKND)
Video 3                        (Arnav and his Brain Cells)
Video 4                                             (IPKKND Misses)
Video 5                    (IPKKND and it's lost charm)

Tuesday, 20 March 2012

IPKKND Misses - In Video

Yes Hayley is back on yet another one of her days off school with nothing  better to do!
Today, I bring you a list of IPKKND Misses...

Sorry about talking really quickly, I didn't want the video to be too long and boring!

Please do comment and like ! 
Love, Hayley x

Vlog Index 
Video 1 (Hayley being silly and IPKKND talks)
Video 2                              (My week with IPKKND)
Video 3                        (Arnav and his Brain Cells)
Video 4                                             (IPKKND Misses)

Monday, 19 March 2012

Arnav and his Brain Cells : A Video

Hayley again, ranting again, being pointless... yes, you guessed it... again.

This video is a bit out of the blue, I didn't know what I would say when I started, and the first thing that came to mind was what I ended up babbling about. Sorry about the sound, I was trying to be quiet so you may need headphones to hear what I am rambling on about..
This is the first video where I am talking, and you will realise I have a pretty awful voice which is why it is best for me to avoid speaking :p

Please comment and like ! 
Love, Hayley x

Vlog Index 
Video 1 (Hayley being silly and IPKKND talks)
Video 2                              (My week with IPKKND)
Video 3                        (Arnav and his Brain Cells)
Video 4                                             (IPKKND Misses)

Monday, 12 March 2012

Where Words Fail, Music Speaks

Music takes us out of the actual and whispers to us dim secrets that startle our wonder as to who we are, and for what, whence, and where to...

Ralph Waldo Emerson

So those of you who know me (Hayley) and have read my writings will know that I am a pretty big music fan.
I listen to songs when I write, well, I listen to songs all the time, but also when I write, I feel that it brings words to life, attaining the spirit of a song and its symphony to words that depict a picture, brilliant and fulfilling, yearning through the fabric of feeling and fantasy. It makes it all so much more real to me, and many a time, I will find that the pace of a song sets the mood for my writings, and it tells the story as much as the words that accompany it.
I normally write OS’s with embedded songs, but because I love my readers so much :) I thought I could write some stuff on suggested songs by you all. So if you have a song/music that you would like something written to, just let me know here by commenting below!
I can't promise that I will write on everyone's suggestions but you can still post whatever you like!

Many people die with their music still inside them. Why is this so? Too often, it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out.

Oliver Wendell Holmes

Sunday, 4 March 2012

| FanFic - Where Happiness Lives | Chapter 11,12 + 13 Up !

Where Happiness Lives
Click here to read Chapters 1-10 and catch up on the back story !

Chapter 1 - You Already Know
Chapter 2 - Is it Love? 
Chapter 3 - Imperfections  
Chapter 4 - Strangeness  
Chapter 5 - Spectrum 
Chapter 6 - Monsters in the Dark  
Chapter 7 - The Little Things  
Chapter 8 - Revolving Doors  
Chapter 9 - Heartlines
Chapter 10 - Where Happiness Lives

Chapter 11 - Would You Lie With Me?
Chapter 12 - You and I Know
Chapter 13 - Lightning 

So, for those of you starting this Fanfic here, the story so far in a small small nutshell is basically that Arnav and Khushi fall completely in love with eachother, Shyam witnesses this and tries to break them apart by lying to Arnav about him having an affair with Khushi. When Arnav confronts Khushi about this, he decides to believe her instead, and asks her to marry him on the terrace the night of Aakash and Payals wedding.. the story continues from there onward. Pleasant reading my dears !

Chapter 11 -Would You Lie With Me?

Arnav looked down at her tear streaked face. It was the face of the one girl he had chosen to care about. The eyes that bled oceans, were the eyes of the one girl that had taught him what it meant to live. The skin that shone precariously in the dim light, like the edge of a bright horizon lining clear waters, was the soft skin of the one person in the world, that he had fallen in love with.

The only one. For ever and for always.

He continued to watch her, as her eyelashes fluttered against her skin, and he encaptured her small hands with his strong ones, feeling her skin run over the swollen flesh on his knuckles before fitting her slender fingers perfectly in the gap between his.

“Khushi” he whispered to her, squeezing her hand lightly “Come on” he ushered, pulling her after himself as he took a step towards the door that led off the terrace, feeling her resist his motion.

He turned to see her shaking her head, fear evident in her bright eyes as she clutched onto the fabric of her dark blue lehenga.

“It’s okay Khushi, you trust me?” he asked, watching her nod “I promise I will keep you safe okay? Everything is going to be okay. Come on” he said again, feeling her take the first step with him, as they stepped back into the house together.

Together, she thought.
Together. For ever and for always.

Wednesday, 29 February 2012

One Shot - Can Anybody Hear Me?

After watching the last few episodes and this breathtaking VM by our lovely Reyabear, I was inspired to write a short One Shot about Khushi. I adore Khushi, and she has been brilliant lately. In the face of her whole life falling to pieces, she has managed to keep it together, and I really wanted to write something for her. So here goes, please do give the VM a watch, the song is beautiful, and the scenes along with it just break your heart, Shreya dear, I hope you don’t mind me using this, just let me know if you want it removed !

OS Can Anybody Hear Me?

The moving air howled at her, the tree's shook their branches in disapproval, the water scowled, throwing out flashes of a piercing blue light against her tired skin in anger.
Even they had become sick of her.

She looked up, arms wrapped around her slight frame to shield herself from the harsh wind, sitting next to a discarded blanket that he had thrown out for her again, the third time. She ignored it, turning away from the disdain it portrayed.  

Somewhere, a million miles away, somewhere, so distant that it took light thousands of years to reach her, she hoped there was someone looking down at her, watching over it all. She picked out her favourite one, a vibrantly sparkling patch of light littered amongst duller sparks against the dark universe. The one source of hope against everything else that hurt so much. Why did it have to be so far away?
She lifted her hand, reaching out towards the star, her chest moaning in a hollow pain as its unattainablility dawned on her.
"Amma?" she whispered to the silent sky "Amma, can you hear me?"

Saturday, 25 February 2012

My week with IPKKND, in video :)

Hello Everyone ! 


I have not decided to unleash upon you minutes and minutes worth of my ranting and face pulling for the future, I just thought I would make one more video because everyone was really nice about the first one 

(which if you haven't seen by the way, you can watch by clicking here - on india forums or here - at my blog)
and I just had a few things to say to my computers in built (and very grainy) camera, so I thought I might as well share.

The video pretty much explains itself, I hope you don't feel like you have wasted precious time which you could have productively used to rewatch ArHi scenes on youtube :p after you are done watching it.

Well, I will stop rambling.. watch away ...

And if you guys want to check out some of my stories, here is my index :) 

Love Hayley x

Vlog Index 
Video 1 (Hayley being silly and IPKKND talks)
Video 2                              (My week with IPKKND)
Video 3                        (Arnav and his Brain Cells)
Video 4                                             (IPKKND Misses)

Thursday, 23 February 2012

One Shot - For You, A Thousand Times Over

Hello ! Hayley here !
I love this song, and wanted to write something to it, so please do listen as you read, and yes, the title of the OS is the famous quote from Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini, a book that I really love (esp because I am from Afghanistan too!)
Don't forget to leave a like and comment, it means so much more than you think!

OS For You, A Thousand Times Over 

A handful of coloured powder blurred her immediate vision, painting it a vibrant purple and yellow as she sifted her way through the littered track of bodies in the garden.
The sun was low in the sky, throwing out dull tracks of light in neverending paths through the horizon. It turned what would have been a dark grey sky into a hazy yellow one, catching the colours of sand that people were throwing out in celebration of Holi with a hue that was strangely eerie and silent.
Khushi's heart was beating frantically against her chest, beads of sweat forming along her brow as she searched for him, worry marking her young face, a face that had aged in experience of the world greatly within the space of a few short weeks.

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Hayley Being Silly and IPKKND Talks

Hello Blog ! Taking a short break from all my writing (after having found it difficult to type away at a computer screen when I need one hand to hold a tissue to my nose and the other hand to adjust my blanket every five seconds) I have resorted to playing around with the video editing stuff on my computer that has lain hibernating for years (as you will be able to tell from the bad quality of the video). Now I purposefully whited it out quite a bit, because I didn’t want my very ill face all over the internet... but yes, the face is not important.
Mostly, it is just a collection of silly clips, overladen with subtitles representing my thoughts, hopefully to let you in a little on what goes through Hayleys brain. I had just washed my hair, so excuse the craziness going on there. Please don’t take offense to the video, it was all meant in good humour. I made it and then decided I might as well upload it, it isn’t anything special, but you might want to take a peek in if you like!
I warn you, you may feel like you have lost a few minutes of your life ^_^
Hahahaha, hopefully not though, but thing is, you will never know until you hit play !
Love, Hayley x

Vlog Index 
Video 1 (Hayley being silly and IPKKND talks)
Video 2                              (My week with IPKKND)
Video 3                        (Arnav and his Brain Cells)
Video 4                                             (IPKKND Misses)

Saturday, 18 February 2012

One Shot - Illusions

So I spent the last couple of days in bed, wallowing in self pity at being ill, waiting desperately for 3.00 pm to watch Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon, with ‘Sajni’ by Jal on constant repeat on my iPod. I assure you all I have not drowned in a pool of my own night sweat from having a temperature of 103 (gross I know), but I have developed a rather strange sense of abstractness and need of a philosophical hold on the world. I’m not sure when exactly it came into play. Whether it was on another headache encounter, or during one of my ‘finding the right temperature to sleep in’ escapades, I suddenly felt very lost.

It may probably be down to the fact that I spent almost 40 hours sleeping out of 50 hours lived, but I felt like I was looking down at the world, down at my life, watching its hoary clockwork gear along through countless components, spindle fibres working away at their own pace, starting and ending where they please, uncertainty in every existence, the unknown hidden away in each mote of dust.

Friday, 17 February 2012

| FanFic - Where Happiness Lives | Chapters 1-10

   Where Happiness Lives


Chapter 1 - You Already Know 
Chapter 2 - Is it Love? 
Chapter 3 - Imperfections  
Chapter 4 - Strangeness  
Chapter 5 - Spectrum 
Chapter 6 - Monsters in the Dark  
Chapter 7 - The Little Things  
Chapter 8 - Revolving Doors  
Chapter 9 - Heartlines
Chapter 10 - Where Happiness Lives

Click Here to go to Post 2 with the next chapters

Hi Hi! This is Hayley and I'm back! I got lots of wonderful suggestions and the best I could collectively pull out from all of it was that you guys desperately wanted a less gloomy story than my SS : Holding On and Letting Go and the end of my FF : Tearing Ourselves Apart So I thought I would write something a bit more happy (with its own ups and downs of course). Anyone wanting emails for updates, please email me at because I am not sending PM's anymore, even non I-F members can send a request :)  

So this story is just something for everyone to read when you need some ArHi time, I haven't planned the story and will make it up as I go along, so don't expect an elaborately planned plot! This one is for good reads and (hopefully) enjoyable words about our favourite two characters.
It starts out sometime after the new year in ArHi world, place it where you like, it's quite open... Pleasant reading folks !

   Chapter 1 - You Already Know 

I have a knack of adding in songs to my updates which for me really set the mood and let you in on my mindset so please do listen to them as you read along !

Her eyes flew open, images of her incomplete dream making their last run across her mind before they wisped away to become distant memories she could not recall anymore. All she did remember, was that he had been in them again. He was intruding into every space around her, filling her head with thoughts that she did not want to think, well, that is what she told herself anyway.

With a sigh, she lifted herself off her blanket and watched the children across the street from the window laugh and play with each other, smiling at their innocence. Her sister was gone and the sun was high in the sky, its heat, beading her head with droplets of sweat that should not have been there in the month of January. Suddenly realising that she had overslept by a large margin she fluttered out of bed and dashed towards the bathroom, walking around with a fizzing foam of toothpaste in her mouth as she grabbed things that she needed and flung them into the colourful fabricated bag at the foot of her bed.
She was supposed to go and help Anjali with decorating the house for the function they were holding that night for Aakash's last birthday as an unmarried man, despite his reluctance. She knew that Anjali would be too busy to even notice that Khushi was well over reasonably late, but that was not the reason for the jittering butterflies in her stomach.

He was a whole different problem.

One Shot - Do Lafzo (Two Words)

Hi Everyone, so needless to say what this one is about. I really had to get something down because I was just dying in anticipation for the ArHi dance and I needed an outlet, so here goes! I hope you all enjoy reading it. And don't forget to hit like to let me know what you thought, it really means a lot!
DO LAFZO  (Two words)


He thought of NK placing his hands all over her and his mind couldn't take it.

The soft skin that flawlessly ran under the emerald saree was only his to touch. He had seen her walk out of the room where the Gupta's had kept their things and he had followed her towards the performance stage.

She looked exquisite tonight. The fact that she was beautiful had already imprinted itself in his mind, but the way her eyes were shining tonight was different. Every feature along her face fit perfectly in its place. Her nose so elegant and proud, her cheeks giving away the innocence that she held, her quivering soft lips that never failed to amuse him. And her eyes. By far the most beautiful part of her, stood out large and shaking when she looked at him, giving away her world of emotions.

How he had found her in all the people in the world, he didn't know.
How he had found the one person that made him melt, he didn't care.
He was just grateful, yet far too proud to ever admit that to her, let alone to himself.

One Shot - Naive

Hello guys! So I have school tomorrow (really hoping for a snow day!) and it is really late but I just wanted to write something after Barun mentioned my name in his Rangmunch interview .. TWICE *faints again* I will admit, it was amongst a long list of members that sent in a collective message compiled by Pari and Sandy (and a few others) but it still made my heart melt! It feels wonderful to know that they got our messages and that he acknowledged them, so thank you Barun for being so utterly brilliant.

OS : Naive

Arnav watched her flutter around in her dark blue lehenga, yards of its soft fabric caressing her satin like skin, running along her as she moved, teasing him. This girl was perfection. Bright illuminating eyes, setting apart their honey glow from her delicate features, calling him in whenever he would look at  her. He sent her a smirk, watching as she nervously shuffled under his gaze, and hid behind her family.
The last time he had seen her, he had told her that he had bought her the bangles she had worn. It was a moment of clarity, although he hadn't answered her question of why? They both knew it, deep down inside anyway. He cleared his throat as Aakash approached him.

"She looks beautiful doesn't she?" Aakash said, staring out towards his wife adorned in a deep red dress on her wedding day.

Arnav nodded his head and whispered "Stunning" staring out at the figure that stood right next to the bride, shining just as brightly.

One Shot - The Ghost of You

I have written an OS about Arnav finding Khushi and Shyam on the roof and its aftermath. It is not very long, and pretty fast paced, but I got lot's of people asking for something to help with the weekend, so I wrote this.
I wanted to share this VM with you made by Awesome.Sauce I fell in love with the song and the video and I found it fitting for this story, please do give it a watch (Below)!

OS - The Ghost of You

Arnav sat on the floor of the poolside, watching the ice blue water gleam in the lights from within.

He remembered her. Pieces of her.
He remembered her magnificent eyes, her illuminating beauty, her feisty courage and her childlike innocence. He remembered how she would stand against him, stand for him, and stand by him. He remembered the way she looked at him, admiration and love so intense, shining through her bright eyes, giving him all the trust she could muster in her being.

He remembered everything.

Everything that he had reduced to dust.


Arnav felt his throat restrict as he turned around, and that is when Khushi's voice cut through the electrifying air again.

"You are crazy" she almost shouted "Stay the hell away from me"